Are you lonesome tonight,
Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?
Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day
When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?
Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare?
Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Friday, December 31, 2010
Last day of 2010~
I woke up today, feeling very happy!
I dreamt that darling has bought me a house, a very big motel+house type of house. The kitchen is nearly as big as a normal apartment living room! Then there is a corridor, diving the house into left and right. I chose to see the left side of the house, and guess what? It's a dorm for backpackers, there's even a cafe! Outside of the window I can even see paddy field! Very scenery. But I don't have a chance to have a look at the right side of the house because I was too happy and I woke up. :(
Anyway, in the dream too, there's another woman, her name is Margeret, I don't know why I named her Margeret. I don't understand why darling gave my ring to her. That's what puzzled me, and I even ask him about it. Of course he won't know what am I babbling about! LOL! But in the dream, he doesn't has any relationship with the woman, and I can actually feel that he really loves me even in the dream! And another reason why I'm so happy is that, he holds my hand tightly when I saw the way 'Margeret' looks at him and I'm in doubt. Does this means that, he'll never give up on me for some other woman, and neither should I?
Anyway, Happy New Year to everyone!
I dreamt that darling has bought me a house, a very big motel+house type of house. The kitchen is nearly as big as a normal apartment living room! Then there is a corridor, diving the house into left and right. I chose to see the left side of the house, and guess what? It's a dorm for backpackers, there's even a cafe! Outside of the window I can even see paddy field! Very scenery. But I don't have a chance to have a look at the right side of the house because I was too happy and I woke up. :(
Anyway, in the dream too, there's another woman, her name is Margeret, I don't know why I named her Margeret. I don't understand why darling gave my ring to her. That's what puzzled me, and I even ask him about it. Of course he won't know what am I babbling about! LOL! But in the dream, he doesn't has any relationship with the woman, and I can actually feel that he really loves me even in the dream! And another reason why I'm so happy is that, he holds my hand tightly when I saw the way 'Margeret' looks at him and I'm in doubt. Does this means that, he'll never give up on me for some other woman, and neither should I?
Anyway, Happy New Year to everyone!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
day 19...... tired day
Just came back from work. We need to do stock-take today, so a few cashiers from upstairs came and helped us out. Me, the pig and a few staffs are settling in- and out-patients while others do the stock-take. Whole pharmacy is like morning market, so noisy. I'm so tired today, don't know whether it is because of stock-take or that my period is coming. I'm having backache since this morning.
He said he's gonna go away maybe around middle of next month. I certainly hope so. I mean, what the hell was I thinking? To do it again and again even though my heart told me not to do that again but my body just react to it. I feel so awful. As if it's not going to end. He kept saying that he won't do that again but the next day it's still the same. Does he think that I'm some kind of a toy or what that he can use when he's boring?
Though I don't like him at all, and most of the times feel that he's very annoying, irritating and disgusting, but when he said that he's going away, I feel a little bit sad. Partly because I'll have to pay more which I certainly don't like about it! And partly because, I'm a bit jealous (of what? I won't tell.)
Sometimes, when I'm reading a book, I fell so in love with the characters, I always feel like I am the main character itself already. Last time, when I'm reading Twilight Saga, I feel as if I am Bella. The girl which has the vampire character in herself even before she was changed. Now, I feel that as if I'm Elena. Elena is a girl that even her purpose is pure and harmless, but others will think that she always wants everything to be revolved around her. Only that I have my own Stefan, but without Damon to torn me apart. What I mean is, I don't like others to "overlook" me. I would like myself to be in the center of the universe. When they "overlook" me, even though I have a boyfriend already, or that I'm their best friend, that is still not enough for me! I'll be jealous! Not satisfy by what I already have.
He said he's gonna go away maybe around middle of next month. I certainly hope so. I mean, what the hell was I thinking? To do it again and again even though my heart told me not to do that again but my body just react to it. I feel so awful. As if it's not going to end. He kept saying that he won't do that again but the next day it's still the same. Does he think that I'm some kind of a toy or what that he can use when he's boring?
Though I don't like him at all, and most of the times feel that he's very annoying, irritating and disgusting, but when he said that he's going away, I feel a little bit sad. Partly because I'll have to pay more which I certainly don't like about it! And partly because, I'm a bit jealous (of what? I won't tell.)
Sometimes, when I'm reading a book, I fell so in love with the characters, I always feel like I am the main character itself already. Last time, when I'm reading Twilight Saga, I feel as if I am Bella. The girl which has the vampire character in herself even before she was changed. Now, I feel that as if I'm Elena. Elena is a girl that even her purpose is pure and harmless, but others will think that she always wants everything to be revolved around her. Only that I have my own Stefan, but without Damon to torn me apart. What I mean is, I don't like others to "overlook" me. I would like myself to be in the center of the universe. When they "overlook" me, even though I have a boyfriend already, or that I'm their best friend, that is still not enough for me! I'll be jealous! Not satisfy by what I already have.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Let's add some color into my blog!
Yesterday working night shift, from 10pm to 8am, was a new experience to my training. It's quite boring, but I can do whatever I like there without worrying that the senior staffs will not be happy! LOL!
Then this morning, after work, I thought of going straight to post office near Christ Church to pay my utilities bill. When I arrived, it's just 8.05am, and the post office opens at 8.30am. I park my car at the road side but I've run out of coupons. Then I decided to drive around finding for carpark. That fella looking after the carpark wanted to collect RM5 from me! I was like, WHAT?! I just wanted to go to the post office! Then I ended up paying him 3 bucks. Well, at least I'm not afraid of being summoned!
But it's still early, and my stomach ached. I went around and noticed that there's a sign board showing the direction to public toilet. Oh, thank God! It's near the riverside and it's quite far, right behind the Red Building. I thought I'm not going to find it. After finishing my business, I stood at the riverside, feeling the cold breeze in the morning, peacefulness and calmness. Then I took some photos.
After half an hour or so, I finally realized that the post office won't be opened because TODAY IS PUBLIC HOLIDAY! IT'S CHRISTMAS! Sigh....
Then I decided to wait for my cousin because she said she's coming around 9 something. I don't want to waste that RM3 for nothing, so I continued to become sakai there. I'd even help a family from Singapore to take their family photos!
Finally when my cousin arrived, she said they are going for Duck Tour. I went there to meet her and went up to Menara Taming Sari together. I never been up there after so many times passing by. And I'm glad I didn't, because it costs RM10 for just that 2 spins! But it's a nice view up there. For those foreign tourists, you guys may try it out.
After that I went back home because I'm really exhausted and all I want is to jump into my bed and sleep!
Here's the story of my Christmas in Malacca!
Then this morning, after work, I thought of going straight to post office near Christ Church to pay my utilities bill. When I arrived, it's just 8.05am, and the post office opens at 8.30am. I park my car at the road side but I've run out of coupons. Then I decided to drive around finding for carpark. That fella looking after the carpark wanted to collect RM5 from me! I was like, WHAT?! I just wanted to go to the post office! Then I ended up paying him 3 bucks. Well, at least I'm not afraid of being summoned!
But it's still early, and my stomach ached. I went around and noticed that there's a sign board showing the direction to public toilet. Oh, thank God! It's near the riverside and it's quite far, right behind the Red Building. I thought I'm not going to find it. After finishing my business, I stood at the riverside, feeling the cold breeze in the morning, peacefulness and calmness. Then I took some photos.
 |
| Here's the idiot! LOL |
 |
| There's my car... Kenari at the back row... |
 |
| Sungai Kampung Mortem |
 |
| Here's the post office without a proper parking lot |
 |
| The famous tourist spot |
 |
| Oh my! look at the eye bags! |
 |
| more people are coming! |
 |
| can anyone tell me what fruit is that? |
 |
| all the sakais........ including me.. |
 |
| Malacca Strait is just beyond |
 |
| City view from Menara Taming Sari. |
 |
| Jonker walk is just opposite |
 |
| Those bricks are since Holland domination era in Malacca! I think... I didn't read the description properly. |
 |
| Nice flowers! |
Then I decided to wait for my cousin because she said she's coming around 9 something. I don't want to waste that RM3 for nothing, so I continued to become sakai there. I'd even help a family from Singapore to take their family photos!
Finally when my cousin arrived, she said they are going for Duck Tour. I went there to meet her and went up to Menara Taming Sari together. I never been up there after so many times passing by. And I'm glad I didn't, because it costs RM10 for just that 2 spins! But it's a nice view up there. For those foreign tourists, you guys may try it out.
After that I went back home because I'm really exhausted and all I want is to jump into my bed and sleep!
Here's the story of my Christmas in Malacca!
Day 14... sunny day
He said he regretted, and want us to forget whatever happened and don't ever bring it up anymore.
He did it when he's not around, and tried to get away with just an apology message, not even apologizes to me face to face! What a coward! Oh, wait, I've know about that long time ago!
Then why does he do that in the first place? Just out of curiosity?
But I can't! I can't just forget everything, as if I have short-term memory loss! I just keep thinking, thinking and thinking! It's killing me that I couldn't tell a single soul about it! Not even to my best friend!
Later on, he said he didn't regret of doing it but instead, he's afraid of something bad might happens!
I know it sounds crazy, but my mind have been flashing back about the good part this whole time and not the bad part of it. If only I could just remember the bad part, it'll make a whole lot easier for me!
It will never ever be the same anymore between us. I only hope that everything will end soon, and then I can get out of this worst nightmare ever!
He did it when he's not around, and tried to get away with just an apology message, not even apologizes to me face to face! What a coward! Oh, wait, I've know about that long time ago!
Then why does he do that in the first place? Just out of curiosity?
But I can't! I can't just forget everything, as if I have short-term memory loss! I just keep thinking, thinking and thinking! It's killing me that I couldn't tell a single soul about it! Not even to my best friend!
Later on, he said he didn't regret of doing it but instead, he's afraid of something bad might happens!
I know it sounds crazy, but my mind have been flashing back about the good part this whole time and not the bad part of it. If only I could just remember the bad part, it'll make a whole lot easier for me!
It will never ever be the same anymore between us. I only hope that everything will end soon, and then I can get out of this worst nightmare ever!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Day 12..... Gloomy day
I almost did something wrong today. Something that is irreversible to me mentally and physically, something that will not only hurt myself and my darling.
But luckily, it's "almost". Means nothing has gone wrong and I stopped before anything has gone too far.
I shouldn't have done it. Just out of curiosity, to see how far I can go.
I'm not sure anyone that I know, will know about this. I certainly hoped not!
Anyway, I've proved a little research of mine today. Would love to share with you but uh-ah...... I won't talk about it. It's a little secret of mine!
But luckily, it's "almost". Means nothing has gone wrong and I stopped before anything has gone too far.
I shouldn't have done it. Just out of curiosity, to see how far I can go.
I'm not sure anyone that I know, will know about this. I certainly hoped not!
Anyway, I've proved a little research of mine today. Would love to share with you but uh-ah...... I won't talk about it. It's a little secret of mine!
Monday, December 20, 2010
Day 8….. heavy rain
This morning, I purposely told him that I’m going out for movie with the guy he doesn’t like me to get close. He said he can’t trust him. Me neither, just normal friend. As expected, he’s angry. That’s a good thing, it means that he still care. But the bad thing is, he hung up on me! And he ignores me! I should be the one doing that and not him ok?! He doesn’t has that kind of priority in this matter!
I thought we’re finish this time.
Finally we ‘talked’ (SMS), he finally knows what I’ve been going through this few days, not just some PMS messing with my emotion.
And I think we’re good right now. Sigh.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)